Wanted

Wanted.

What did I want from it?

It’s easier to ask what I expected from it. Let’s go down the list. One, Angelina Jolie showing off her finely-toned posterior: check. Two, the most heavily enhanced CGI gunfights since… Shoot ‘Em Up, I suppose. Double check on that one. Three: heavy-handed social commentary. Check. Four: an unfaithful adaptation of the comic: check. Finally: Every action movie cliché. Check that one with permanent marker.

What did I not expect, that I actually received: To be on the edge of my seat; a satisfying resolution; to have fun; to not expect the twist when it came.

Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen, is closing in on the solution to its inability to perform. In lieu of the (apparent) dearth of quality scripts and directors in Tinsel Town, big studios are working on making the perfect bad movie, using every corpse in its closet. Lacking any other direction, it has begun to consume itself, in spectacular fashion. The End of Cinematic Days… can we pray for it? Dare we?

This new action flick features passable acting from McAvoy, Freeman and Jolie, fight scenes that can only be described as spectacles, and oddly uncharacteristic Danny Elfman scoring. Uncharacteristic in that it is boring. Accustomed to more vivacious scores like that of Beetlejuice or Nightmare Before Christmas, it was odd to discover that the bland score I had just heard was from such a unique, if repetitive, composer.

It’s the classic orphan story of unimportant-guy-with- untapped-congenital-super-powers- who-trains-to-use-them. The conceit is central to countless classic stories, of which Star Wars is the most famous. It’s a guaranteed hook for audiences, as it provides incentive to empathize with the hero. The hapless protagonist archetype, guided by a friendly/seductive veteran archetype and aged mentor archetype to guide him, confronts an evil arch-nemesis archetype. Classic. Insert archetypal training montage with archetypal final task to complete before the hero is ready to fight the villain. Insert archetypal first assignment… You get the gist. This movie is a series of great archetypes in an essentially bad story.

Plus, the team of elite assassins is guided to their targets by threads in swatches of cotton.

Don’t ask questions, just accept it.

Casual 4^th-wall breaking moments break the monotony, as do the wonderful messages strewn in various places throughout the film, such as with airborne pieces of a smashed keyboard, ATM messages, or etched onto a bullet.

Ultimately, this film is a wet dream for those who have shitty, repressed lives who wish something magical would happen to them. Another great hook, as these people represent a significant portion of Western society.

The end… It doesn’t leave much room for a sequel. I was shocked. That was the only cliché that Wanted abstained from. Not that it has stopped them before, but I was waiting for some Mortal Combat sort of ending to rear its ugly head. I was pleasantly surprised.

Overall, I’d advise you to go see it. It’s fun as long as you don’t expect it to be the next Dirty Harry.